Finding My Peace in the Sound of Music

At nine years old, most people think my life is just about playing and having fun. I am in third grade, and my main job right now is to focus on my studies. I live a pretty simple life, trying to do my best in school and keep up with my lessons. But even at my age, life wasn’t always easy or happy. Before the flute came into my world, things felt very heavy for me.

My days used to be very quiet and, to be honest, quite boring. I wasn’t a very happy child back then. I struggled a lot with my health, and because I was sick quite often, I started to feel very low. It felt like I was getting depressed. When you are small and you don't feel well, the world looks gray. I would go to school, come home, and try to study, but there was no spark. I was just going through the motions. I wanted something to change, but I didn’t know what that "something" was. I just knew I needed to find a way to make my mind feel fresh again.

One day, everything changed because of a small moment on a screen. I was sitting down to study for my class, and I was using the computer. Suddenly, an advertisement popped up. It was for flute lessons. I stopped what I was doing and just looked at it. Usually, I ignore ads, but this one was different. I looked at the flute and I had this sudden feeling: "I can pick this up. This could make me feel fresh."

The moment I decided I wanted to learn, I felt a tiny bit of peace. It was like a small light turned on inside me. I didn't know how to play, and I didn't even have a flute yet, but just the idea of it made me feel like things were going to get better.

When I first got my flute, it was much harder than I thought it would be. I remember holding it for the first time and trying to blow into it. It didn’t sound like music at all. It was disturbing. The sounds were cracking and hissing. It sounded like an angry snake, not a musical instrument. But I told myself to stay still. I told myself I would solve the problem.

But then came the biggest challenge: the side-blown flute. At first, I was practicing on a simple whistle-style flute, but when I moved to the professional side flute, I felt completely lost. I couldn't get the finger positions right. I couldn't shift my hands properly. I felt like I was failing. I remember sitting there, looking at the bamboo in my hands, and thinking, "Flute is not for me. Why did I pick this up? I am not good at this."

I almost gave up. I was ready to put it back in the case and never open it again. But then, I felt something inside me. I call it my inner power. It whispered to me that I should never give up. It reminded me that I wanted this to feel fresh and peaceful. So, I kept practicing. I practiced when I was tired, and I practiced when I was frustrated. Day after day, I tried to make that one clear note. And then, finally, one day, it happened. The sound came out clear and sweet. I had done it.

A real turning point for me was when I started learning with my teacher, Guruji Harsh Dave. Even though I come from a family with a music background, I never learned in a "structured" way. I knew bits and pieces, but I didn't have a map. The community and my teacher gave me that map. They taught me the raags and the alankars in a way that made sense to my nine-year-old brain.

The moment I truly felt like a "committed learner" was when I finally played the song "Hum Honge Kamyab" (We Shall Overcome). As the notes of that song came out of my flute, I felt a huge shift. I wasn't just a kid making noise anymore; I was a musician. I realized that because I stayed with the structure and didn't quit, I was now able to play almost anything I wanted.

Since I started playing the flute, my whole personality has changed. My parents and I noticed that I react to things differently now. Before, I was sad and bored. Now, whenever I pick up my flute, I feel excited. I feel happy and calm. The most surprising thing is what happened to my studies. You would think that spending time playing music would take away from my schoolwork, but it’s the opposite. Because the flute makes my mind so fresh and calm, my studies actually feel much easier now. I can focus better. I don't feel that "gray" feeling anymore.

Looking back at that first day is funny to me now. On the first day, the flute felt like a strange, difficult stick that made hissing noises. Today, when I hold my flute, it feels like it belongs in my hands. I went from making cracking sounds to successfully reaching the "Foundation Finisher" level.

I’m still just a nine-year-old in class three who has to focus on his studies, but I’m a different version of that boy. I have my health struggles sometimes, but they don't make me depressed anymore. I have my flute to keep me company. I have learned that if you stay still through the problems and listen to your inner power, you can reach the other side. My flute is my peace, and I am so glad I didn't give up on it.

— Avyan